Holding on in Trust

This is an entry I wrote yesterday before I had a chance to get on the internet:

After Ivonne and I kept busy yesterday decorating the room, it was nice to have a mellow day today. We woke up at about 8:30 (which is actually the latest I've slept in so far. The sun rises at about 6:30 every morning, so it's actually harder to stay in bed after 7 unless you really try), had some breakfast, played with the boys and read. While we were reading at about noon, the catholic church that sits kitty-corner from mine and Ivonne's room started to play some music over their loudspeakers just before making a general announcement. It was about a festival they are having this evening to celebrate the virgin Mary. after making the announcement they played a little more music. Ivonne said they make announcements a lot, which is not something I'm looking forward to, because it's very loud and we keep the window open to try and keep things somewhat cool, so it's even louder still. 

I went on a walk this afternoon with Wendy and Joshua (he's the four year old) to go see the tailer who will be working on my teaching uniform. We walked along a trail that is right across from the jungle area and it was BEAUTIFUL. I'm really excited to live so close to such beautiful, lush forests. On a good day, when there aren't as many clouds in the sky, there is a beautiful view from the school of the Sangay Volcano. It's not very far away; just outside of the city limits. Ivonne said the trail we will be using on our runs takes us right by the river through a small part of the forest. I'm excited!

I still can't really believe I'm here. I mena, when I walk the streets and go to the stores or am at the house with Robin, wendy, Ivonne and the boys, I know I'm here. But it's still foreign and scary territory to me when I think about just how long I'll be here for. Not in an I-don't-want-to-be-here sort of scary, but in the sense that I've never done anything like this before and just the thought of days, weeks and months here can be so overwhelming and terrifying sometimes. I don't really know how to describe the difference between cold feet and just the fear of the unkown. But even with that weak spot, I know that God has a purpose behind all of this. Because of that, I rest in the assurance that He has brought me here and He is faithful. "When I am most afraid, I put my trust in You; in God I put my trust, fearing nothing [Psalm 56:3-4]". 

I thank God and relish in the moments where my spirit is stirred with joy and peace in knowing that this is where God has called me to be. Like when Pastor Domingo greeted me at the prayer meeting Thursday night. He embraced me in this big, bear hug and told me he and his wife have been praying for me ever since they first learned I would be coming, and were so excited for me and blessed to have me as a missionary at the school. He called me "nuestra Hermanita Ali" as he introduced me to the rest of the church. Or when Ivonne and i prayed together the night before she went to Cuenca for the weekend to see her family. I had been praying throughout the year that God would bring me a sister that I could pray with, be real with, and share in fellowship with throughout the year. When we prayed together, I knew that Ivonne would be that sister for me. My heart couldn't stop leaping. Ivonne told me later that she hadn't prayed with a friend like that in years, and was moved to tears. I was so overwhelmed with humility in realizing that not only did God answer my prayers by giving me the accountability and fellowship I needed in Ivonne, but He also wanted to use me to answer her spiritual needs. I am countinually astounded by how intricately God works. It's such a beautiful, awe-inspiring and humbling thing to witness.